Ho Ho Ho's and Santa Chomos

In honor of the holiday season I'm showcasing some of my favorites form Creepysanta.com because it's just a barrel of fun.

This poor child knows not what she does, Santa on the other hand has the option to pick her up and hug her instead of letting her suffocate in his crotch. 

Another Santa possessed by the devil or the photographer encouraged the children to punch him in the dick. 

Either these kids are devout Jews who have been kidnapped by Uber Christian parents forcing the holiday upon them or this Santa is terrible at his job, since they look very Aryan race I think it's the latter. 

This Santa looks like he worships the Devil, the child on the right can feel it. 

This should be an innocent, adorable photo, but of course we're all pervs and the giant phallic pink balloon makes it look like that sweet little tot is holding a giant cock, Santa's facial expression doesn't really help either. 

Apparently back in the day subtle Santa molestations were acceptable, did they hold the parents in a different room or something or was this the norm?

This one really fucking killed me. That funny little infant face with that creepy background Santa is truly priceless. What was up with that weird ass 80s trend to have people in the background, shadowing over the main subject??

I myself am guilty of at taking an attention whorish/ inappropriate Santa pic at the local mall when I was 13 with a gaggle of girlfriends and lemme tell you he was very verbal about how having us young ladies sit on and crowd around his lap pleased him and made his holiday season a little more jolly. Ho Ho Ho!!

It wasn't quite this inappropriate.


I was also the victim of a creepy Santa when I was about 5 years old and I have the video tape to prove it....woaaaah!! Settle down perv, I didn't feel his lump of coal or anything he was just super aggressively forceful at wanting to force me in to singing Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer with him, despite my sweet, polite decline to do so. For whatever reason the jackass wouldn't listen to my fucking Christmas list without singing it first and even had the audacity to pull my thumb out of my mouth, which I had started sucking on as a way to relieve the stress that was being induced from the situation. He kept insisting that a pretty, sweet little girl like me should want to sing a Christmas Carol with him- I could not be coaxed. Eventually he let the issue go and listened to my request for a Water Baby and let me go to my mother who was standing uncomfortably on the sidelines. Upon being reunited with her I said "That Santa was weird Mommy", her reply "I know honey." To this day I am convinced that he was a sociopath and probably murdered children while listening to Christmas Carols.

This is how I felt when sitting with the forceful Christmas Caroling Santa, but I was cuter and didn't bitch out and actually cry. 

If you have any creepy Santa pics of your own you HAVE to upload them to this site and then tell me about it ASAP.

This guy had way more fun at the Mall than I did, it's really not fair that he didn't call me up to participate. I  also love  how non-reactive all his fellow Mall goers are. He was a one man flash mob. You go boy! Also I think one or both of my Grandma's has that sweater.